I've been out of the States recently on vacation (I'll post pictures of some cool street art I found on my adventures eventually) and ended up spending a lot of time in hotels. As you may have noticed, there is almost always a bible in the drawer next to the bed in a hotel room, which I decided to read in my down time. Some of the things I read were hilariously ridiculous, but at the same time, it's horrifying that some people legitimately believe these things. I don't mean to single out Christianity, but I didn't have access to a Quran or any other religious text (though I'm sure they are all filled with their own hilarious absurdities.)
Here are a collection of some of the most ridiculous excerpts I've selected from the Bible:
Any person who curseth his father or mother must be killed
There are some pretty glaring contradictions in the Bible--this being one of them. What about "Thou shalt not kill"?
If a man has sex with a woman on her period, they are both to be cut off from their people
People who have flat noses, or are blind or lame, cannot go to an altar of God
Doesn't God create all people? Way to set them up for failure, God.
Anyone who dreams or prophesizes anything that is against God, or anyone who tries to turn you from God, is to be put to death
Not only does the Bible tell you to kill here, but it tells you to kill someone for something they can't control, i.e. dreaming.
The eating of fat is prohibited forever
Entrance into the assembly of the Lord was granted only to those with complete testicles
Stubborn children were to be stoned, and the stoning was to be instigated by their parents
False prophets are to be killed by their own parents
To kill or not to kill, that is the question.
If a man beats his male or female slave with a rod and the slave dies as a direct result, he must be punished, but he is not to be punished if the slave gets up after a day or two, since the slave is his property
If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives
Yes, the Bible requires rape victims to marry the rapist.
If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters - yes, even his own life - he cannot be my disciple
Luke may have had some psychological issues.
Don't let cattle graze with other kinds of Cattle
Don't have a variety of crops on the same field.
Don't wear clothes made of more than one fabric
Don't cut your hair nor shave.
For six days work may be done, but on the seventh day you shall have a holy day, a sabbath of complete rest to the LORD; whoever does any work on it shall be put to death.
You will eat the fruit of the womb, the flesh of the sons and daughters the Lord your God has given you.
How come you never see any of these quotes on t-shirts or bumper stickers?
Behold, I will corrupt your seed and spread dung among your faces.
Here are some of the contradictions I mentioned earlier:
For I am merciful, saith the Lord, and I will not keep anger forever.
Ye have kindled a fire in mine anger, which shall burn forever.
These are both from the same book in the Bible.
If I testify about myself, my testimony is not valid.
Jesus answered: "Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid."
And Jesus said, "For judgement I am come into this world."
I came not to judge the world
Think about how much people invest themselves in this book.
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.
Jacob said, "I have seen God face to face, and my life is preserved."
No man hath seen God at any time.
We should fear God
We should love God
There is no fear in love
It's good to question beliefs. Especially your own.